back to blogging... and more of me...

Wow... It took me more than two months... and you bet... I have a lot to write...
Well, happy New Year... this is indeed my first official post for the year. hehehe!!!

Last year was indeed a roller-coaster ride of emotions. I laugh a lot… cried a lot… loose weight a little… gain weight more… hehehe!!! Lose a friend… gain a new one... been in almost both extremes and the best part of it… I am fallen’ in love…

Well, had a wonderful start of the year. No more baggage and finally I could say I have moved on and accept my defeat and enjoy the blessings that come with it. I spend my new year in Negros at my Dad’s house… with my cousins, nieces and nephews, and relatives. It was fun… we went to the beach… I just relaxed and enjoy its tranquility… I have never been sooo relaxed in my whole life.

After my broke up with Ali and after me picking up the pieces again, I know I could finally say this… I have forgiven them… and I hope they will forgive me. Truly, it was a good relationship that ended bad and after all that has been said and done… I still would want to thank Ali for always letting me learned life’s best lessons… and I know Ali will always be a part of me. He was a great friend... a good provider and a shoulder to cry on... I know what we have gone through taught us a lot and it will surely help us become a better partner and individual. And I hope we will love our partner more than ever, alllowing ourselves to truly experience the very true essence of finding one's true love... I know in time... all wounds will be healed... Thanks Ali... Good luck and Stay in love...

This is indeed a wonderful year for me. I have been really blessed with true good friends. I will always be grateful for:

RA, Sam and Erick. I know, we don’t go out that often now since we are all busy with our lives. Sam in his struggles whether to leave for Dubai or not; RA with his new relationship; and Erick with his wedding.

I have not seen or talk with Cat, Pot and Reng for so long, but I know they're just there for me… and I missed them.

David on the other hand is still there cheering my day.

To my mobsters family, and specially to Jaja… hay!!! Who would have thought I could find friendship in this very quite and eccentric person… but I am indeed lucky and blessed she have come to trusts me and supports me… letting me see the other side when sometimes I am lost… hehehe!!!

Of course, to Kuya Alwell, Ate Vicks, Kuya Uly, Kuya Yugs and of course Kuya Bes, who still celebrate special occasions with me… and still support me in my struggles, always willing to accept me in my moods, defeats and triumphs...

And lastly, I am indeed blessed to know Jern… I never realized we could be really good friends… and that he would share his thoughts and his beings with me… trusting me with his deep-dark secrets… running to me when he is in need. It is indeed very overwhelming…

Now can you see how happy and blessed I am right now?And Wait there’s more:

I am indeed enjoying my relationship with GOD and I am proud to say that I am on the process of knowing HIM more… developing my relationship with HIM… giving up my worldly thoughts to follow HIM. Opps… don’t get me wrong… I am not there yet, but on the process… but one thing is certain, I will give up everything for HIM because that’s how much I love HIM.

And I am in love…
Well, who would have thought…? I have loved him all this time… and I know I wasn’t brave enough to admit it then since I am not sure if the feeling is the same. But I have crossed the bridge… whether he’ll be at the end of the bridge waiting for me or not… I love him not because he loves me… whatever is in store for us… I know, in time it’ll blossom… just like the missing piece…

I am still continuing praying for him and for us… as my old line goes… “You know what’s the worst thing in life, WAITING!!!” but now… it’s even worst... “I don’t mind waiting and experience all the worst in life… with HIM!!!” Luxury in life is indeed a bonus… but having him is more than that… and we know in God’s time… for now, we are both nourishing our relationship with GOD.

Truly, “everything works for good to those who LOVE the LORD”.

"can you hear the laughter.. can you hear the music..."

This is indeed my best christmas... happiest ever... a little sad but everything will be settled in time...

Thanks to Erick and his family for accomodating Sam and Me...

Life is indeed full of surprises... when you thought life can be this lonesome and sad... someone would be there to cheer you up... and I know inspite of how things could go wrong... I know... I am truly blessed to have known so wonderful people around me. I am thankful indeed to have the opportunity of knowing such wonderful family.... thanks Nanay and Tatay...

We just ate and watched DVD's... we chatted until 5 in the morning... I had so much fun... much more when you see their gift... WOW!!! never been luckier... hehehe!!! I know I am sooooo blessed!!! then we watched movie in the afternoon... hay!!! ang saya!!!

Well, when everything is fine... and you thought you have your best day... someone will give you their best blow... well, I have to admit that I felt sad when Erick broke the news but I am still wishing the best for them... I am very willing to sacrifice my own personal happiness just so everything will work... well, I know... Erick is such a good friend... and whoever this man's gonna settle with is indeed lucky because when HE says "I am yours..." He means it.... and I know that at the end of it... he will remain where I left him... he will always be my friend (*teary-eyed*)... hay!!! Well, best wishes and good luck friend... this too will past!!!

Thanks Sam and Erick... it was indeed a merry christmas!!! love yah!!!

when you thought everything is gone...

I never got to verbalize this... but life would never be the same with out these people... and I know... THANK YOU would not be enough...

Wondering who are they? Well, my three best buddies at work and even outside of it... that's SAM, RA and ERICK...

Having them around you would twist your world around... would give you their best blows... and then lift you up to where you should be... they are not the type of person you'll thoughT you can be mushy with but trust me... their sweet... without meaning to... hehehe!!! They exists differently... but they have one thing in common... aside from the fact that I am special to the three of them... hehee!!! walang kokontra... I know I am, in their own special way... and I thank them for that... they are all passionate in what they're doing... they will stick with you when life is so tough... and when your wounded... they will help you get through it... and i am indeed blessed they are my friends...

To my Honey Sam: My Movie buddy... You may not see it but movie time without you is never complete... and thanks for the innocent way that you care... sa mga banat mong pa naive... for trusting me whenever your doubtful... as you always are... hehehe!!! I hope in time... you'll realize whatever makes you happy... and whether it will be in Dubai... or here... dito lang kami... dito lang ako...

To my Baby RA: My Boyfriend in Good times... hehehe!!! Thanks for always letting me see things objectively and even if it means hurting me... we may not talk as often as we did (sam, erick and me), i may not share with you eveything that I feel inside but I know and always been sure you'll be there for me... ikaw man ang pinakamayabang kong kaibigan... i love you for being so... I hope... whatever you have right now... will last and for real... I am happy for you and her...

To my friend ERICK: My Boyfriend in Bad TImes... kasi ginulo ko ang mundo nya... hehehe!!! Kidding aside... I have to be honest that among the four of us, we are the closest... well, we laugh a lot... talk a lot... even eat a lot!!! and we can always talk things comfortably with each other... whether it's about life... love... triumphs... and even defeats... Thanks for always being there friend in my worst time... God Bless you and Lally... stay in love forever...

TO SAM, RA and ERICK: True friends speak the truth in love... Thanks for being ONE!!! God bless... love yah!!!

White Christmas...

All of these pictures were taken last December 18... my first christmas with CONVERGYS... Had fun... indeed!!! Can't you see it??? hay!!! Never been blissful... thanks to everyone...

"Ba happy... life is too short to be unhappy. Smile."

It's not goodbye... but see you later...

This was our send off party to Ms. Penny... Convergys, employee #1... and to her we owe a lot... it was indeed a very sentimental farewell... well, every goodbye is indeed sad... even if our hearts wanted her to stay... we know that she is indeed happy with her decision... and I do admire her composure and gracefulness in facing all her defeats... for sometime we'd want to question her strength... on how far she can fight for us... but bravery is not just about fighting just to prove something... but sometimes it's all about keeping your ground... holding on to it... silently doing what's best for everyone... sometimes... or most of the times... brave people never have to fight... it is eassier to deal with anger and resentment... but it takes more courage holding your ground and just get on with it... keeping silent and wait for the right time... for everything will come in HIS own time... .

Now I realized that in every crossroads... you really have to choose... in the words of Ms Penny... "don't be afraid... for there is no bad decision as long as you decide for it... for at the end of the day... LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT..."

To Ms. Penny, Thanks for all the support... for the lessons I have learned... even in a hard way... WOW!!! That's makes me more stronger and mature right now. We will always look up to you... not just a boss... but as a friend... a sister... and more... a mother... God bless... We are happy for you... You will always be CONVERGYS' Number 1 EMPLOYEE...

Will surely miss you...

For David...

See this pic??? Well you should! This is about being extra sexy, extra raunchy, extra cute and extra crazy. All these for one extraordinary person who makes my day! All for David!

You might not notice but Joanne and I were actually sick that night but we can't afford not to attend the surprise we had been preparing only for David.

It was indeed a success and kudos to them for being so creative: Eden, Rain, Joanne Yang and Joanne Parras (Hope I spelled their names right).

I have never done this in my entire life, not the surprise thingy but dressing up in "not the usual me" - modelling and all! Whew!

This is kinda emabarrassing but for DAVID I will do it again. I will do whatever it takes just to see this man happy! HE TRULY DESERVES IT and more!

Dave, thanks for all the support, for considering me as one of your friend, for trusting me with your deep-dark secrets (don't worry i won't tell) heehehe!!! Thanks for all your patience!

Most of all, thanks for styling me and making me modelled your dangling earrings. Thank you! Thank you!

Truly true friends speak the truth in love, thanks for being one! I Love You Friend!

More happiness on your birthday and the holidays to come!

some things never change...

I have a lot to write... hehehe!!!

Last weekend been the craziest weekend ever. As in the craziest yet the happiest...

Well, had a wonderful birthday bash at Gerrys' Jupiter... Thanks to those who came and celebrated our birthdays... Lhen, Milette, Roms, Eden, Sharon, Ms. M, Nonie, Bang, Sam, Eric, Ms. Cha, Erick and Kuya Bes... Just merely looking at these people and how happy they are on that night gave me such contentment within that I know I made the best decision in my life... Well, every decision is not easy... believe me... hehehe!!! And really now I realize that I am Blessed!!!

Well, some things never change... and that's Kuya Cias... hehehe!!! He arrived last Saturday all the way from New Zealancd, and mind you... he seem to be the same person we looked up to then... same old JEANS and SHIRT... hehehe!!! But I think he is more in love now. Looking at his eyes with all excitement and kilig seeing ate LIrs.. WOW!!! You'll be blessed seeing them and even if how painful I've been through... still I'd wish to fall in love again... well, it will come!!! it will come at HIS OWN Good time...

Anyway, to KUYA CIAS AND ATE LIRS... Best Wishes and Congratulations... I never got to verbalize this but thanks Ate Lirs for all the love and support... and for letting me feel beautiful everyday!!! Truly, you deserve each other... God bless... Best Wishes... a cheers to you on your wedding day...

"when was the last time you did something for the first time...?"

originally posted last: December 9, 2005:

I took a glimpsed on the new Starbucks Planner, to justify the need that I have to complete the 21 stickers (meaning 21 starbucks coffee/beverages)... so I can get one. Mind you it's not for sale... it's for free when you complete the required stickers. Well, I only need six... and looking forward to my new 2006 Planner...yahoo!!! thanks to Erick for helping me complete... Anyway, that's where I got my subject...

When was the last time I did something for the first time???... I am fixated... to many things... I hate change!!! I don't want to get out from the situation I know I am already comfortable... but certainly things happen... and you just have to face it... and this what I love about life... chances... fate... when you thought everything is going well and then all of the sudden... blagag!!! But you learned... and believe me it cuts me deep...(thanks ate ja for the line)

When was the last time I did something for the first time???... well, this morning... I ordered for HOT CAFE MOCHA at starbucks... I've waited and got one Cafe latte... whew!!! I got frustrated... knowing me... I would have to go back to the counter and have it change... but I did not... at that same moment, I decided to try it... did i enjoy the coffee? nah... but I felt surprisingly happy about trying it... it may not taste good to me... certainly, I woudn't know, not until this morning... :D

Life is indeed about choices... and staying happy even if you are defeated...

For the first time in so many years I enjoy being with myself alone... and I love it...
See yah!!!

it's all about me...

originally posted last December 6:

it's all about me... and this is my day...

a brand new me? nah... I'm just back... but loosen a little... hahaha!!!

For the past years I have been counting days 'till my birthday... I had my twirks and moods in between... i had my birthday blues... this year? don't know... worst than blues... but never been happier...

Well to start with, I am enjoying single blessedness... hahahha!!! yeah, If you happened to see me two weeks ago, I know, you'll be very disappointed... because people don't usually see the "bruised side of me"... that was then... but the pain is too painful to bear that i surrender all my defenses and admit my defeat and let go... hahaha.... for truly all endings are also beginnings... and thanks to Morrie by the way...

Well, after everything that has said and done... life can be summed up in three words... "IT GOES ON..." Am i Happy now? yeah... and it's within...

Honestly, when I was on my way home last night, I was quite sentimental about it... gosh... it's my birthday and no plans... no expectations... still configuring how to finish all my back logs from a "two-week-out-of-the-blue-moments"... hay!!! hay... glad that I am back... and suddenly i missed the feeling that someone is waiting for the clock to tick at 12 midnight to greet me... hay!!! wishful thinking.... and i am wishing... well, it was a wish come true... HE DID!!! hahaha!!!

The day is almost over and still no plans, that I almost would want to have my "pamper myself day" but i find it too pathetic... spending the day alone... and yes indeed this day turned out to be a special one... thanks to Yuga, Kuya Alwell, Ate Vicky, Ate Titing, and Ryane for celebrating my birthday with me...

at first i thought this was a different celebration but hey i remembered... this how I used to celebrate my birthdays then... surprises from friends... well that was so many years ago... and I know... i missed them... hay... had fun really!!! but one person is missing... hay!!! I missed Kuya Gen there since he can't come to attend some family errands... but this person is so special to me... he is indeed a blessing... so he would remain... my kuya bes...

Thanks to those who remembered...

Most of all thanks to Ryane...

By the way, he made this day extra special!!! Well, never really known someone who will conspire everything just to make things happen... that's Ryane... I'll tell you more of his surprises next blog... aside from the call to greet me... he sent me flowers... asking why it is a big deal... because this person is somewhere on the other side of the world... and not even sure if I really existed.. had given so much effort in knowing me and letting me realize that " if worst comes to worst, leave the car and find my way back home...and that's faith in action...". I may gone through a lot these days and if I recover sooner than expected, it's not because he is there... but simply because... he always reminds me of God's unconditional love... and to have faith that when you submit everything to God, he'll take care...

Thanks Rye, I still believe in answered prayer... seeing you... growing in HIS love and enjoying your relationship with HIM... I am so proud of you... thanks and can't wait to see you...

It was really a HAPPY AND BLESSED BIRTHDAY...
GOd bless...